The Diary of Ginevra Weasley
by UntalentedRose
Summary: Ginny has started to feel strange around a certain brunette. Can you guess who? I mean you picked the filter so it shouldn't be that hard. The rating is T just to be safe. First story so let me know what you think.
1. Chapter 1

**A.N. Hey guys or girls or other. First story up I'm not sure how I feel about it. Before you say anything yes I know really short. I didn't want to put too much in if everyone wanted to kill it with fire after they read it. It's basically one of Ginny's journal entries on how she feels for Hermione. How she doesn't know what to do with the feelings she has around her. I don't know why but I absolutely love this pairing. If you could leave a review and let me know how you feel about it that would be awesomesauce! All mistakes are my own and no one can take them from me! Let me know if you like it hate it or whatever! I give you The Diary of Ginevra Weasley.**

**Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING! Well I own my laptop and the pack of gum I bought yesterday. J.K. Rowling owns the rest. We all know that if I owned any part of Harry Potter there would have been some major changes!**

I remember when things we're normal. Well as normal as you could get in a school full of witches and wizards. I didn't have to plan which route I would take to avoid her. We used to talk between classes like normal friends do. I don't think I ever saw it coming really. The feelings that just wouldn't stay down and let me be normal. She never used to make me feel this way. I wish I could blame Ron, but the truth is I know it's my fault. I should have hidden it better, or maybe I should have stopped hanging around them long before now.

I never could help that stupid smile that she always caused. She didn't even have to speak to me. I just had to see her and boom there it is. I swear if I didn't have Luna to pull me out of her spell I think I would still be in front of the potions room. That's where it all started by the way. Where I realized I felt more for her than friendship. I know for a fact that Luna saved me that day. I almost made a complete fool of myself when I saw her walking with Ron. I was so jealous, but the thing is I had no idea why.

If Luna hadn't stopped me from walking over to them I don't know what I would have done. All I know is that it would have been bad. I've never hated one of my brothers before and that scared me. Mum would have a fit if I got into a fight with one of them, especially on school grounds. I would have been in real trouble when I couldn't explain why I started the fight in the first place. I certainly couldn't tell her it was because I was upset he was holding her hand. That even made me wonder what is wrong with me. I mean their just holding hands for crying out loud! It's not like they were all over each other!

I'm positive if they were I would have lost it. Ronald would be in St. Mungo's from one of my best hexes. I don't think I would feel guilty about it either. That's the scary part, I shouldn't hate Ron. I guess that's another thing that she has changed about me. I avoid her at all costs now. I can't stand to see her around him anymore. It's gotten to the point where I miss meals and Harry is upset that I've missed so many practice sessions. How can I play with my head in the game when all I can hear is her cheering for him?

I know it's not fair to Ron or Harry but I've stopped talking to them too. I just can't bother with trying to be happy and joke around with them anymore. It's too much effort and it leaves me feeling worse than I felt when they started talking to me. I don't think it will ever get better. I might just have to find a whole new set of friends. Ones that don't have to constantly talk about "The Golden Trio". Maybe then I can start to feel something other than hurt when I see them. I know it's not fair but I can't help it.

I don't know if I can ever talk to her again. I always seem to lose the ability to function, even on the most basic level, when she's around me. I can' tell you how many walls I've walked into, or how many stones I've tripped over. All she has to do is look at me and I turn into a blubbering fool. I think I would have gone insane by now if not for Luna. She always seem to pull me back from the edge of stupidity. She really is my best and only friend. I've come to accept it rather easily. If I just tak to Luna and no one else, I have less of a chance to say something stupid.

Hermione Granger has me under some sort of spell I'm sure of it. I just don't know how to break it. I don't think I will be able to, I mean she is the best of the best. She excels in everything. I couldn't even begin to understand how to break this spell even if I tried. Maybe if I play it safe and stay away from her it will wear off soon. I mean she can't keep it up forever can she? Can she?


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello once again boys and girls... and other. Many thanks to all of you who reviewed! So I decided that I would torture Ginny a little more. Not sure how I'm gonna keep this going. I'll figure it out soon I promise. Here's another chapter while you wait for me to get my self together. Enjoy!  
**

**Disclaimer: I own none of these characters for they are not my own. If I did own them I MANY things would be different. Many...**

I landed in the hospital wing today. I shouldn't say landed, more like crashed. She was at practice again, and I couldn't focus. I ended up with a bludger in my back and a face full of dirt. That's what I get for being so distracted though. I can say that I absolutely loved that she stayed with me for most of my visit. Then Ron took her away to "study" so he could pass his next herbology test. It seems everyone but Hermione knows that he just stares at her the whole time. I mean the boy doesn't' even listen to what she has to say! He just stares at her like a creep. I know, I know I stare too but at least I listen when I stare. I always listen, even when she thinks I don't pay attention.

I think things are getting worse between her and Ron. I feel like a git for it, but I'm happy about that. I think she's starting to notice how the only real time they spend together is to "study". I feel like smacking Ron across his head sometimes, I really do. How can you not love to spend time with Hermione. THE Hermione Granger smartest witch of our age! Even with out the tittle she's still amazing. She always has time to help someone else, even when she has something she needs to do. The last time we talked was when she was helping me with potions. I could tell she wanted to finish her charms paper the whole time. She never once complained about me taking up her time though.

I started to feel unbelievably lonely when she left with Ron. I didn't even notice Harry when he came to check on me. I wasn't in too much pain, it only hurt when I tried to turn around. I was lucky enough to leave after I drank down the most foul tasting potion I've ever had. It did help with the pain so I guess it was worth the nasty taste it left behind. I didn't really have the stomach for dinner. I passed a few first years on the way to bed. They were awfully secretive about something, I just chalked it up to girls being girls though. I didn't expect to see Hermione in the common room when I got there. She was sitting in a chair reading by the fire.

I couldn't help but watch her for a few moments. It was a sight I would remember for ever. She was always the most beautiful when she thought no one else was around. She let herself relax and enjoy the quite that solitude brings. I can understand why some people like to be alone. It's freeing in a way. You don't have to worry about how you act or do things. It's just you and your thoughts that you have to deal with. I almost jumped out of my skin when she called out to me. Being ever so curious she asked why I wasn't at dinner. I lied of course and told her I wasn't feeling too well.

I couldn't exactly tell her that I felt like an outcast. That I felt like I couldn't talk to anyone. How I knew no one would understand how I felt. She would start asking questions, questions I didn't want to answer. She knew I was lying of course, she's not as dense as Ron or Harry. She gave me a strange look but didn't' call me on my obvious lie. I started to feel rather odd knowing that I was caught, so I said a quick goodnight and ran up the stairs as fast as possible. I don't know if I'll ever be able to stay in the same room with her. When we're alone things are worse. I can almost keep down these stupid feelings in a crowd.  
I'm not sure I should stay on the quidditch team. If she's going to start showing up for Ron I can't stay. It's all I can take watching them sit next to each other. Forget trying to not hear her cheering his name. I swear every time she does I see red. She did call my name before I got attacked by a blugder though. It might not have been as encouraging, but she still said my name. It's pathetic that she distracted me that much. I'm one of the best flyers from Gryffindor. I need to either learn how to keep her out of my head or quit. I'm not really into getting beat up every practice. Harrys drills are hard enough without getting hit with a brick.

I'm not sure what else I can do. I'll try talking to Luna tomorrow. We haven't had much time to ourselves lately. Practice and assignments seem to be getting in the way a lot. I'm sure she'll agree that I would be better off jumping from the owlery than talking to Hermione again. Things only seem to get worse when I'm around her. I'll have to try harder to stay away. No matter what I can't let her figure out how I feel. Even if it hurts, I have to stay away. Is it possible for your heart to actually break?


	3. Chapter 3

Ch.3

**AN: Ok so I know what you're thinking. "What the heck why you take so long to update!" I know, it's been forever. I really don't have an excuse. I've been looking for a job so that's taking up some of my time. Then I started to play Brink and CoD. I know not a very good reason to not update. I just felt a little uninspired for a while. I think I'm back in my groove though. It's not the longest chapter but I figured I'd put something up while I work on another chapter. Hope you like it feed back of all kind is welcome!**

**Disclaimer: Sadly I still don't own anything Harry Potter related besides the books and a movie or two. I know it's sad but we can't have everything now can we?**

She almost caught me writing about her again. AGAIN! I need to start writing before bed again. The only problem is that I have dreams about her when I do. I would love to avoid those. Not because they're not enjoyable, but because it makes it harder to go about my day knowing it was all a dream. I know what you're thinking, man up and deal with it. It's just not as easy as you would think. It's like hearing a song in your head over and over again. It's sort of a bitter sweet feeling really. It feels great to think about her, but when I remember that I can't have her it starts to hurt again.  
I'm not sure how she does it but she found a way to run into me today. Like literaly run into me. As you can imagine I was pissed that my books and quill were all over the place. That all changed when I learned who had run into me. Of course she wouldn't stop apologizing, no matter how many times I told her not to worry about it. She's sweet like that, always making sure you're alright. That's one of the reasons I had been avoiding her. It's hard to forget someone as nice as her. Almost as hard as forgetting how to fly.

I'm still on the fence about that, Quidditch I mean. I really do love the sport but seeing her there everyday is starting to affect me. I really don't need another visit to the hospital wing. Mum would have a field day with that news. Harry has been acting strange lately. I'm not sure how I know but something big is happening. You can practically see the gears turning in his head. He's rather bad at hiding things, almost like Ron when he's excited. Harry doesn't get obnoxious though, you can just tell he's thinking of something important. I thought about asking him if everything was alright. I quickly threw that out the window it flew in though. If I can't handle my problems then who am I to try and help him with his?

Luna seems to be under a lot of stress too lately. I haven't' really talked to her about Hermione these past few weeks. I feel like it would be a bother, she already has so much going on. I've actually almost stopped talking all together. Not that many people have noticed. Dean has tried to chat me up a lot recently. I'm not sure what he's on about, but a swift punch in the nose sent him in the other direction. Hermione wasn't too happy with me when she found out about it. I hate it when she's upset at me, but I couldn't let him think my silence meant I was interested. I had to do something and punching him was the first thing that came to mind.

That's another thing, I'm quick to violence. Not with Luna or Hermione, I haven't hit Harry yet either. I almost hit Ron yesterday, but who hasn't thought about smacking him upside the head. If you haven't at least thought about it you've gone mental. I doubt that would hold up in a court of law, but I might be able to convince mum he had it coming. Not that I want to hurt him, most of the time. At least not when it's for something I shouldn't be upset about. It's almost like I can't stand to even look at him.

Just the sound of him breathing makes me cringe sometimes. I've never had that happen before, even when he demolished my broom last summer. It scares me to think that I can't even stand his existence. I've tried to avoid him as best as I can, I don't want anything to happen on accident. I can only hope that I can keep myself in line until the holiday. Hermione and Harry are both invited to the burrow for the holiday. I don't really mind but I was hoping for a stress free environment for a few weeks. I have no doubt that it will be close to impossible to avoid her. Mum always has us bunk together. We're really the only girls in the house so it only makes sense. I just hope I can survive. It shouldn't be too bad, it's just like every other holiday right?


	4. AN

**No this is not a chapter sadly. I thought I at least owe you an explanation as to why I'm not updating. I've been wicked busy trying to find a job. Plus school has started for my little brother and sister. What does that have to do with me you ask? Well I shall tell you my little readers. I am charged with the lovely duty of dropping them off and picking them up from school. I also get to drive them to any after school events and dances. YAY! (sarcasm at it's finest) Also I'm not the fastest writer out there. This I know. **

**I can really only write when an idea pops into my head. If I try to write when I'm not inspired evil things happen. It gets scary... Anywho I have had the privilege to be involved in a forum revolving around Harry Potter. The authors involved are awesomesauce and have written great stories for it. I'll put links to their stories at the bottom for those who are interested. That way you also have something to read while you wait for my turtle butt to post. ^_^ Everybody happy happy happy! Alas I do have some of the next chapter written and I will give you a sneak peak to hopefully keep you interested! I own nothing! Huzzah! **

**Ch.3**

You know how you train your dog to keep a biscuit on it's nose until you tell him to eat it? Well it's animal cruelty at it's finest! Only now do I know it's not a cute little trick, but a horrible punishment. I am in the same predicament as the dog at this moment. I am no less than 20, count them 20, feet away from a naked Hermione Granger. I know, I'm surprised I'm still alive too. I thought I suffered heart failure when I realized how close I am.

**Well that's it. I don't want to give to much away. I might have already, but I'm sure you'll be waiting to see what happens. Here are the links I promised! Be sure to leave them lovely reviews!**

Larissa676: frost on the

**eskimobee: s/9595283/1/A-Monster-an d-a-Madwoman**

**MagicalGirl85: s/9595975/1/Sneaking-Out -One-Shot**

daisy97: s/9599280/1/Sweet-Peas

We Are All Infinite: s/9599338/1/News-and-a-Nam e

thecolorofmagic s/9599752/1/When-all-see ms-lost

**DracoMalfoyIsNotSexy: s/9601096/1/I-d-even-joi n-the-Death-Eaters-just-for-you**

Sweets5236: s/9602491/1/Raindrops-in -the-Wind

thecolorofmagic: s/9599752/2/When-all-see ms-lost

sian'olivia: s/9632018/1/Love-Among-E nemies

Epikoinos**: s/9641536/1/A-Series-of- One-Shots**


	5. Chapter 4

**Ch.4**  
**Disclaimer: Do I still have to do this? I mean we know I don't own anything. I don't even have $20 in my pocket. No thrift shops for me. Oh well...**

I don't know why I write in this stupid thing. It doesn't really help anymore. I thought it was a brilliant idea when Luna suggested it, that was 6 months ago. I can tell you what boy howdy it's not so brilliant anymore. I think it pisses me off more than it helps me. I hardly write in this stupid thing anyway. The trouble is I can't seem to throw it away. I keep thinking that maybe one day she'll read this, and we'll have a laugh over how silly she was for being with him. I know I shouldn't dream like this and get my hopes up. I just can't help it sometimes.

Mum is making a meal fit for an army as usual when we have anyone over for the holidays. Not that any other time she makes a meal she doesn't make way too much. I think she likes to go all out for Harry. He seems distracted lately, more so than usual. I'm thinking of telling him about my problem. He's given me a few weird looks, almost like he knows. I'll have to see how long I can keep him in the dark before he says anything. That isn't the problem at hand though, and it can wait.

You know how you train your dog to keep a biscuit on it's nose until you tell him to eat it? Well it's animal cruelty at it's finest! Only now do I realise it's not a cute little trick, but a horrible punishment. I am in the same predicament as the dog at this moment. I am no less than 20, count them 20, feet away from a naked Hermione Granger. I know, I'm surprised I'm still alive too. I thought I suffered heart failure when I realized how close I am.  
I don't know how I've stayed on my bed this long. I'm not sure if I want to try my luck in getting downstairs though. I'm not sure how much of a fool I'll be if I run into her on her way back to my room. Why would it be a problem you ask? Well she always leaves her clothes outside of the bathroom. Why does she do that? That is a wonderful question to which I have been given the answer. She doesn't like how the steam makes her clothes feel like she's left them in the rain. So not only am I less than 20 feet away from a naked Hermione Granger, I will also soon be in the same room as a naked Hermione Granger. I'm not sure if I have total shit luck or God is just enjoys watching me squirm.

I'm sure if anyone ever decides to write a book on torture all they would have to do is read this. I can see it now. I'll be the famous girl who died from crushing on her best friend, and having a spaz when she took a shower at my house. My head will smack off the wall behind me and then slam into my nightstand. Then my poor lifeless body will slide onto the floor. DEAD! Damn I hope that's not how I go. How suck would that be? If it does happen I hope my mum reads this and realizes I don't want that put in the obit. I might just die again from embarrassment.  
The trouble with writing in this thing is that every time I do, I have to stop before I've written everything down. I doubt it's an emergency but if I don't go see what she want's I'll have to listen to her explain why I should run when she calls for me. Mum can be a little insane like that at times, but she's still the best mum in the world. She hasn't told anyone about how I feel. I was a little scared to write her about it before holiday, but she didn't freak out or anything. I bet that's why she's calling me downstairs now though. She said we would have to talk but I wasn't sure when. I hope dad doesn't freak out when I tell him. I don't think he will, he always likes to learn about new things anyway. Maybe we can sit down and talk about it, like some sort of father daughter time. Even if he doesn't like how I feel he'll still love me, right?

**AN: Yes I know short but I didn't have too much time to chug this one out... I'm still kind of trying to find where I want to go with this story. I'm not sure if I'll keep Ginny miserable yet. I might give her a break in the next few chapters. It's just so fun to watch her fumble around. Enough of my rambles, if you've made it all the way down here -and didn't cheat and skip the chapter sneaky sneaky ;)- thank you for sticking around this long! If you're a new reader welcome! If you could drop a review that would be so awesome! They let me know how I can improve the story and or any spelling errors that I miss. Thanks again for waiting and I hope you've enjoyed your stay!**


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